“There is more wisdom in your body than in your deepest philosophy.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche
One of the things that stood out to me in this conversation with Brad Feld and Dave Jilk, longtime friends of over 35 years and co-authors of Entrepreneur’s Weekly Nietzsche: A Book for Disruptors, was in the rapport between them. It takes a level of care and attention to foster a relationship that can weather the ups and downs of each other’s lives and as well as various business partnerships and shared ventures.
“It’s the trust that helped us so much as partners in a business and as colleagues working together in a variety of capacities and in a variety of things,” Dave notes. “We take the point of view of the other seriously, and listen and think about it.”
Good friendship consists of a safe place to be yourself and offer that to another. It’s a place where there’s mutual respect and trust that you’ll show up for each other in ways that make the other feel seen and heard. It’s a place in which you feel deeply considered by the other.
Perhaps it’s my experience as a petite woman in this world, but what landed for me in Dave’s words was what it feels like to be taken seriously and to have your thoughts, insights, and feelings seriously considered. What a gift; and what grounds for the respect of the other that compounds trust in the space between. It creates the allowance for you to show up more and more of who you are.
Relating is quite a thing as humans. Clean and clear relating, that which is without emotional manipulation, is a profound and potent endeavor. At our best, we’re able to be attuned to ourselves, and what happens for us in relationship, and equally as curious about what’s happening for the other person in front of us. When we’re able to attune to another, our presence and care shows that what they say and how they are is considered. They know that we won’t tromp their boundaries, ask too much, or push them over the edge of what keeps them sane.
Our bodies know the difference. The safety that we afford another in this way of relating brings dividends to both parties. There’s a richness in having a place–a friendship–that you want to return to time and time again. It’s there that we can share not only some wins, some losses, some struggles, some challenges, but our hearts.