Reboot Podcast Episode #163 – How To Bear Our Suffering – with Koshin Paley Ellison

The Reboot podcast showcases the heart and soul, the wins and losses, the ups and downs of startup leadership. On the show, Entrepreneurs, CEO’s, and Startup Leaders discuss with Jerry Colonna the emotional and psychological challenges they face daily as leaders.


Koshin Paley Ellison

Koshin Paley Ellison

Co-founder of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care

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Episode Description

In this episode of the Reboot Podcast, Jerry sits down with Koshin Paley Ellison, co-founder of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care, to talk about his latest book, Untangled. In his work as a contemplative caregiver, Koshin seeks to better understand the causes of suffering and works to nurture sources of strength such as resilience and compassion. 

In their time together, Jerry and Koshin contemplate epigenetic trauma and the varying ways our personal suffering can be tangled by the experiences of our ancestors. They marvel at the power of love, and the healing that can come from bearing witness to our own suffering and the suffering of others.

Show Highlights

Top Quotes:

“To me what is required in this life is to allow our hearts to not just break but also be a companion to our own brokenheartedness.” – Koshin Paley Ellison

“The who’s going to untangle the tangle is up to each of us to learn how to pause, learn how to reflect. And the only way to really do that is by being awake and receptive and connected to others.” – Koshin Paley Ellison 

“There’s something about the nobility of our own suffering. It takes noble strength to meet our suffering and to say, “I see you.” I’m with you, fear. I see you, terror. I see you, confusion, anxiety, whatever that is, and all the things that I’ve experienced in my life.” – Koshin Paley Ellison

“I feel like we live in a world where we always are trying to cover what’s hard. Cover what’s real.” Koshin Paley Ellison 

“Some of my ancestors came from Italy and when we don’t acknowledge that they were leaving a land ravaged by famine and prejudicial oppression from northerners, then it’s possible to deny the humanity of immigrants on the southern border of the United States who are seeking exactly what my grandmother sought.” – Jerry Colonna

“That’s why I’ve always loved Buddhism in general, ’cause it’s just not interested in any dogma, even though people turn it into dogma. But it’s really experience based. How do I share with you that this is so fricking hard and I understand that it’s really hard sometimes and it really sucks sometimes?” – Koshin Paley Ellison

“I don’t believe that we should romanticize suffering. And I don’t think that that’s the teaching as much as it is acknowledging the existence of that suffering, in whatever form it takes for you or for your ancestors or for your descendants or for your neighbors and friends or your family.” – Jerry Colonna

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